We don't know God. We think we do, but we don't. If we did, we'd be content...joyful...passionate. People would notice a difference. I think His church knows Him little better than the world, by the looks of it's fruit. When "Christians" look and act not unlike the rest, you have to wonder. Unsettled believers, I'm beginning to understand, are suffering from a delusion. We have believed in someone we don't really know. Our flesh and the Great Deceiver have successfully bound us in a relationship that isn't real and eventually, the unreal becomes unbearable. If this "Jesus relationship" is supposed to be so powerful, than why am I not at peace? It's because an impotent imposter has taken His place. We thought we knew Him and married the wrong guy. So often we believe what we want to believe. Until the obvious is too painful to continue ignoring. We've taken the word of experience and logic rather than His own Word.
Leonard Ravenhill said, "You can't say Jesus is all I need until He is all you have". We have to lose everything to gain Him. There is no other way. You can try for years, but it'll always come back to that. I'm still clinging too tightly...to something...anything. Why do I fight you for something I don't really want that to take what you give that I need???? Good question, Rich Mullins. The secret paradox of Matthew 10:39, "Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it."
It's a stormy, cold, quiet day today. If you can, you might want to watch this amazing movie. I've watched it twice now...that's a HUGE endorsement. I rarely watch movies more than once. It really helped me understand, feel and wrestle through this truth. It's sort of a dramatic monologue, with a bit of flashback wake-me-ups throughout. I think the climax of the movie is when she lets her hair down. What do you think? She finally gets it. I want to really get it...by my actions. To let my hair down...not just in my mind, but actually.
You can watch it on Netflix.
Hope you enjoy and benefit from it as much as I have.